June's Disgruntled Employees of the Month: Fred Grant, Police Officer
Fred Grant: Could I see your license and registration please?
Gary Newbrunswick: Certainly, officer.
FG: Do you know why I pulled you over?
GN: Uh... no. Well, I might've been a little over the speed limit.
FG: You got it. 50 in a 35. What's the rush?
GN: That much over?
FG: That much.
GN: Well, I'm running a little late for work this morning.
FG: Uh huh.
GN: The boss hates it when I'm late. You know how it is.
FG: Uh huh.
GN: Man, a ticket sure would jack up my insurance prices.
FG: Uh huh.
GN: But, hey, I know how it is. You're just doing your job.
FG: That's right.
GN: And I for one am damn glad you're doing it. It's a thankless job sometimes, I bet, being a police officer.
FG: Yes.
GN: Facing danger and keeping the rest of us safe from harm. A servent of the people.
FG: Yep.
GN: An employee of the common man.
FG: Uh huh.
GN: You know, you could even say we were co-workers.
FG: How's that?
GN: Well, local businesses taxes help pay your salary, right?
FG: Yeah, but...
GN: So I work for a local business. Amalgamated Humor. They pay us both, so we're co-workers.
FG: No we're not.
GN: You know it's part of my job to pick our company's employee of the month.
FG: Mmm hmm.
GN: We call it Disgruntled Employee of the Month. You know, for laughs.
FG: Mmm.
GN: Ha ha. So anyway, I just had the idea of naming YOU our employee of the month! How about that?
FG: It makes no sense.
GN: It's quite a rare honor.
FG: Rare?
GN: Sure.
FG: You do it every month, right?
GN: Well, sure, but...
FG: Please tell me you're not trying to bribe me with this honor of yours.
GN: What? Bribe? No.
FG: Because that is the saddest attempt at a bribe I've ever heard.
GN: Ha ha. Bribe. No, no. I just think our boys in blue are due for the honor.
FG: Right. Well, gee. On behalf of policemen everywhere, thanks a lot.
GN: Hey, it's the least I can do. Give a little back.
FG: OK. I'll be right back with your ticket then.
GN: God damn it.
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