Amalgamated Humor's Disgruntled Employee of the Month

Each month, Amalgamated Humor's Public Relations specialist, Gary Newbrunswick, puts the spotlight on a valued member of the Amalgamated Humor corporate family. In addition to an extra vacation day and photo with a receptionist from the executive office, they also get a featured interview.

September's featured employee: Secretary to the Presidents, Miss Randi Vavoom


Executive Secretary Tina Vavoom, escorting Mr. White to the V.I.P. dining room for lunch.
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Gary Newbrunswick: Congratulations, Randi.

Randi Vavoom: Thanks!

GN: How long have you been working for Amalgamated Humor?

RV: For almost a year now, since I turned 18. Mr. White hired me right after I won the Miss Muskegon beauty contest.

GN: And what do you do here?

RV: I'm the secretary to the presidents, Mr. White and Mr. Brockie.

GN: Right. And what does that entail?

RV: Oh, not much.

GN: Answering phones?

RV: No, we've got an automated system for that.

GN: Sorting mail?

RV: No, the boys in the sub-basement mail room take care of that.

GN: Typing?

RV: I used to, but I kept breaking nails. Now the other Secretary to the Presidents, Mrs. Eunice Crabknees does all the typing.

GN: So what do you do?

RV: Well, I do have to do a lot of filing. I'm back and forth from by desk to the file cabinet all day, filing things.

GN: Really?

RV: And the presidents will often supervise the filing, to make sure I do it right.

GN: I see.

RV: You'd be surprised how many files start with X, Y, and Z.

GN: No, I wouldn't. Anyway, what do you do when you aren't at the office. What are your hobbies?

RV: Well, I like to exercise, apply makeup, and have the occasional plastic surgery.

GN: Who doesn't? Well, congratulations, Randi.

RV: Thanks, it's been a pleasure.

GN: Oh, the pleasure's been all mine.

RV: Everybody says that.


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