Amalgamated Humor's Disgruntled Employee of the Month

Each month, Amalgamated Humor's Public Relations specialist, Gary Newbrunswick, puts the spotlight on a valued member of the Amalgamated Humor corporate family. In addition to an extra vacation day and photo with a receptionist from the executive office, they also get a featured interview.

October's Disgruntled Employee of the Month: Marty Lurnlin

Gary Newbrunswick: Our Disgruntled Employee for this month is Marty Lurnlin from Accounting. Congratulations, Marty.

Marty Lurnlin
Amalgamated Humor Archives

Marty Lurnlin: You're a week late.

GN: Pardon?

ML: You're a week late doing this interview. Don't you normally announce the Disgruntled Employee of the Month on the first Friday of each month?

GN: Well, yes, but I've been very busy.

ML: Hmmph.

GN: We've got Election 2000 going into it's final stretch, and on top of that we've got this whole Halloween relaunch thing.

ML: Was that supposed to be an apology?

GN: Uh, well, I was just explaining the reason I -

ML: Because I've been a good employee.

GN: Nobody said you hadn't, it's just -

ML: I've been with this company for 13 years and have never - NEVER - been the Disgruntled Employee of the Month before.

GN: Well, it's a big compan-

ML: And now when I finally get it, you're telling me it's going to be cut short because-

GN: Well, I've just been, uh, a little busy.

ML: Because you've been "a little busy."

GN: I can see why you might be a little annoyed.

ML: And still no apology.

GN: Right, uh, I was meaning to get to that. I'm sorry.

(Awkward silence)

ML: Is that it?

GN: No, uh, I'm sorry I didn't get to you at the proper time, but we all greatly value your, um, loyalty and ability and uh, loyalty.

ML: You already said "loyalty."

GN: Well, it's a very important trait. I feel terrible that in the business and the stress of recent weeks I forgot to get to you at the proper time, but when I realized my mistake I thought maybe I should just wait until next month, but then I said "No. Marty Lurnlin has waited long enough for his turn to shine! He should wait no longer!"

ML: Well, I guess that's acceptable then.

GN: Great.

ML: OK, let's get on with the interview.

GN: Look, I'd love to, but uh,(looks at watch) I gotta go take lunch with one of the models from the shoot they just had for the Cap'n Wacky lingerie ad. You know how it is.

(GN rushes out.)

ML: No- no, I don't.


Click Here for the Disgruntled Employee of the Month Archives