January 4, 2008

By BRODIE H. BROCKIE

NOTE: In early November I got in to an argument with myself and went on strike. Later, I checked in to let you know how I was doing. Now...

I was at home during the recent holidays/strike and really doing my best to keep not writing anything, distracting myself with activities like decorating cookies, eating cookies, decorating the tree, eating the tree, and so on when I received the following greeting from an old friend:

Dear Brodie,

Hello. I recently visited capnwacky.com and read some of the new material for the first time in ages. For a little while there, after you and Mr. White fired me from my V.P. of Public Relations position at Amalgamated Humor, Inc, I was simply to bitter to check in. then, after a little while, I just couldn't afford internet access. A couple of months after that there was this lengthy period when I also could not afford a computer or a place to live in which I might keep a computer.

Then, things started turning around for me when I got a job managing a Joe's Crab Shack until one day when in the midst of leading the waitstaff in singing ÒHappy BirthdayÓ to a pimply adolescent all the hate and bile in me exploded into a fit of all-consuming rage. I pulled the lacquered swordfish off the wall and repeatedly smashed it into the large wooden sea captain statue that greeted customers by the front door.

Later, during my stint in the institution, my therapist would suggest that this was because the statue reminded me of Cap'n Wacky. In return, I suggested that he was still unmarried because he was both ugly and unlovable.

Because this too, you see, was fairly obvious.

In time, though, I finally began to heal, left the institution, got a job writing for a small town newspaper, moved up to working public relations for a mid-sized hospital. After working for Amalgamated Humor, I found myself easily able to handle the potentially moral shaky ground of smoothing over horrible, life-ruining (or ending) mistakes made by medical personnel.

Finally, about a month ago I found myself capable of calling up www.capnwacky.com on the computer again. There, I saw your corporate mentality had finally driven yourself nuts to the point that you were striking against yourself. And with that, I knew I could drop a line and let you know I've finally healed and forgiven you. Happy new year, and good luck with your current state of insanity.

Sincerely,
Gary Newbrunswick

After that, I kind of expected the ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future to show up, but when they never did, I returned to the office, came to a mutually agreeable situation with myself over whatever issues I'd made up to give myself a month or so off, and returned to working on capnwacky.com. Then I called Gary up and asked him to come back too.

SO: now that we're back from the strike... we're going to take a little break and write some new things. We'll be back soon with a retooled, re-launched capnwacky.com with your old friends, and some new and different directions as well. Come back and check it out, won't you?

Happy new year,
Brodie H. Brockie