WELCOME LISTERS! by Franz Liszt Hi there, I'm the ghost of Hungarian composer Franz Liszt, and boy am I Hungary! Ha ha, get it? Seriously, though, I really am hungry. I've been dead since 1886. That's a long time to go between meals. You'd think ghosts wouldn't get hungry, but you'd be wrong. Very, very wrong. Still don't know who I am? Really? Because a lot of people consider me the greatest piano virtuoso of all time. Hey, THEY said it, not me. I'm not trying to brag here. I INVENTED the symphonic poem, man. I wrote Mephisto's Waltz. Ring any bells? No? How about Liebestraume? You haven't? Fine! You know that song Bugs Bunny plays when he's trying to kill the mouse inside his piano? I wrote that. Sheesh, get a little culture, people! No, Archduke Ferdinand I am NOT talking to you. I'm talking to the people reading this comedy website that I... Website. It's on computers. People connect them to... You don't know computers? God, you died WAY after I did! Try to keep current, man. Sorry about that, folks. Anyway, if there's one thing I loved more than the piano, composing, or fried bologna sandwiches, it's numbered humorous items under a common category. I can't get enough of them! That's why I've been asked to be your host for this lists section of capnwacky.com. Between sessions of being lashed with flaming whips by cackling demons and being made to listen to Andrew Lloyd Weber musicals in the fiery pits of Hell, I'll be compiling the finest comedy lists I can for your delight and merriment here. And maybe, in return, one of you will find a way to send me a delicious sandwich. I'd even settle for just a slice of bologna! Please, I beg you! OK, I've got to go now, but I'll be back with new lists soon. Check back often and don't miss the non-list comedy on the rest of capnwacky.com Seriously, without me there would be NO Debussy OR Schoenberg. They're standing on my shoulders, man! What? You've never heard of them either? Oy.

 

Snooki in Disney World